Stargate Atlantis: The Musical, Season Four
by nightfynix
Summary: Well, you know the drill... but it's gonna be zanier and crazier than ever before! More sets, more bad puns, and more bad guys!


hey you all (again)! we hope you had a very happy holidays and we hope you will have a happy New Years! Since we hope you guys got a lot of presents for the holidays, you can all add this as another Christmahanakkwanzica present (thats Christmas, Hanakkah, and Kwanzaa all smushed together!) yay!

and now, (_drum roll_) we introduce (_drum roll_) Stargate Atlantis - The Musical, Season Four!!! (_the crowd goes wild!_) WOOT!

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**Prologue**

McKay: Hey... weren't we just... weren't we...?

He spins around in confusion.

McKay: Weren't we just doing something else on another stage?

Sheppard: ...yeah...

He seems very confused too.

Ronon: Where are we?

Two writers appear out of nowhere.

Nightpheonix: You are in the future.

Seanait: Well, the very near future.

Nightpheonix: Sort of...

AT-1: ...What?

Nightfynix: Never mind.

Seanait: The important part is that you stay calm…

Nightpheonix: Do not try to change anything.

Seanait: We have complete control of the vertical...

McKay, indignant: Hey wait, that's _Twilight Zone_!

Sheppard, whispers: It's _Outer Limits_, by the way.

McKay, scowling: Quiet you.

Sheppard: And you call yourself a scifi fan...

He sighs and McKay glowers at him.

Teyla: ANY-ways!

Seanait: Right. So now it is season four and you are in Atlantis. Well, not all of you…

Ronon: So I guess that mean's there's gonna be some changes around here, eh?

Weir pops in and looks around.

Weir: I don't know what you're talking abo--

She disappears in a puff of smoke. Standing in her place is Samantha Carter, accompanied by the rest of SG-1

McKay: What are they doing here?

NP: We adopted them!

Teal'c: Indeeeeeeed?

Seanait: Well, no, you don't have to sing.

Sheppard: Why not?

NP: Because WE'RE KEEPING THEM AND SCI FI CHANNEL WILL NEVER GET RID OF THEM!

The writers grab Teal'c, Mitchell, and Daniel and run off.

Awkward silence.

Sheppard: Well... that was a bit out of the ordinary.

Everyone glares at him.

Sheppard: What?

McKay: Since when is **anything** "in the ordinary"?

Sheppard: Touché...

He stares at his feet quietly.

Carter: Sooo... how do we do it here?

Everything comes to a screeching halt.

Teyla: What just happened?

Ronon: I don't know...

Sheppard: Um Sam, we don't actually **do** it here... there isn't nearly enough time.

Carter glares at the two Earthlings.

Carter: That's not what I meant!

McKay has a dreamy look in his eyes as he stares at Sam.

Carter: McKay, knock it off. I'm not DOING anything with you. I'm your commanding officer!

McKay, love-struck: ...So?

Carter glances at Sheppard: So that means I can do this.

She nods her approval at Sheppard and he smacks McKay upside the head.

McKay: Ow!

McKay whimpers as he rubs the back of his head

Carter: Anyways... I've never been in a musical before. How does this work?

Ronon: Well, mostly, we get put into zany situations, we argue with the authors, we argue amongst ourselves, we sing, and then someone gets crushed by the falling curtain. That's usually how we roll.

Carter: ...so just like every-day life, but with singing?

Ronon: Kind of...

Carter: Sounds... interesting.

Teyla: Can you sing?

She directs her question to the authors before Sam responds.

Teyla: Can she sing?

Sheppard: Yah! Where'd you two come from!?

Teyla: Shut up John. Can she sing?

Seanait goes to open her mouth, but Nightpheonix steps in.

Nightpheonix: We can't divulge that information. It may tamper with the timeline.

Seanait: You should know better than to ask about future-

Nightpheonix: No matter how near.

Seanait: --events.

Ronon: I hate time travel.

Sam: Been there, done that.

McKay: So now we're going to have to manage the last two acts of the third musical, while simultaneously working on the fourth?

Nightpheonix: Well, it's easy if you have a flux capacitor.

Seanait: Or a TARDIS.

Nightpheonix: Think about it--you could travel to the far future and be finished with all the musicals for all the seasons before the show even started!

Ronon: That sounds like a plan.

Sheppard: Yes it does. You two wouldn't happen to have one of those lying around would ya?

Nightfynix: We wish!

Carter: I'm assuming then that these two are the authors?

AT-1: Yup...

Carter: Ah...

McKay: Wait!! We're doing this dialogue-style!

All: So?

McKay: So we never do the prologue dialogue-style! It's always written in story format!

Teyla: You're right!

Sheppard begins to list on his fingers: Carter's suddenly appeared, Weir's disappeared, time has no meaning any more, and we're speaking in script format. This can only mean one thing...

AT-1: OUR ENTIRE UNIVERSE IS BEING TAKEN OVER BY REPLICATORS AND THIS IS JUST A FABRICATED SCENARIO!

The End (with maniacal laughter fading into the background)

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mhahahahahahahaha!!! well, whadda think? good, bad, evil? well!? hehe!

Happy Holidays and have a Happy New Year!

12/28/07


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